I feel like this slice needs a disclaimer…I didn’t intentionally use any particular aspect of craft besides honesty. If nothing else, that’s something that I’ve really enjoyed in my classroom lately. The honest way my 7th graders have been writing about why they want to research a particular job, the 8th grader who hates poetry, and composed an acrostic saying so. So often, we’re not honest about things…so maybe that’s my craft today.
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Perhaps it’s the poetry unit seeping it’s way into my subconscious mind, but lately I’ve been considering the ebb and flow, the cycles and patterns into which I find my life falling. Over and over again. Sure, there are some who see such routines as boring, and hum-drum, and those living at the other end of the spectrum who prefer the predictability. I find myself living somewhere in the middle. I like consistency and seeing the way doing one little thing repeatedly makes a marked difference. The trouble is, I find myself continually adding “little things” to do.
This is my second year of teaching part time, a schedule that literally allows me to live somewhere in the middle between working full-time and being a stay-at-home mom. I love it. And at the same time, I find myself filling the “extra” time with so many other things, and yet leaving so many things undone.
The underlying inspiration of this post, is to say that right now, things are clicking so beautifully in my classroom. I. am. loving. it! I’ve noticed a change and I hope that it’s for the best. Still and yet, I’ve fallen a bit behind on a personal photo project I’ve committed to, I’ve neglected to write anything here for two weeks, I have papers to read and score, dishes to wash, and memories to make with my family. This moment – the second or third week of a new term is all too familiar. I’m optimistic that this is the term that I will stay caught up, I will make it work. Yet, the fact that some things are already slipping makes me wonder….I’m the type of person who revels in the routine and craves consistency. Yet, this is a cycle I find myself wanting to break. Because, if I don’t, it means in a week or two, I’ll find myself feeling so far behind that I’ll want to give up. The crazy thing is, once it starts to go…it’s goes in all areas – school and home! My plans will get less detailed, I won’t take the 5 minutes to pick something up, and I’ll feel less than the person I want to be. I like routine…but I desperately want to shake things up, and settle into a good rhythm, one that benefits my family, my students, my friends, and helps me maintain my own sense of well-being.
It’s happening…and this time…things. will. be. different.
I need routine too. I need deadlines. If it isn’t in the calendar, it probably won’t happen. It is hard to sort out the true “have-to’s” from the “want-to’s” from all the other stuff. I would like to simplify things but I also want to be open to new possibilities.